How to balance a spiritual and material life is a question I get often in my workshops. A few days ago I was chatting with a friend who is struggling with finding her path in life. She’s a very spiritual person but is unable to take action to find her path and purpose. She’s been struggling with:
- How do I know that the decision I will make will be the right one?
- How can I find my purpose in life?
- I know I need to make a change but I don’t know where to go
I think many people struggle with these questions. Finding a balance between spiritual and material life is not easy.
In short
I reckon spiritual balance is when what you do and who you are stop arguing with each other. It starts with your Monk: know your values, take action that’s true to them, be patient and practise it daily. Build your Suit around that, and inner peace tends to follow.
Over the past 12 years working in Asia I’ve been helping people find their path and purpose in life through workshops and one on one coaching. From my experience, I can tell that most people are focused on material life instead of the spiritual. However, this lady was more spiritual than material.
What Spiritual Balance Actually Means
I reckon spiritual balance isn’t about splitting your life into a “spiritual bit” and a “work bit”. It’s when what you do and who you are stop arguing with each other.
You know the feeling. The meeting goes well, the numbers look good, and there’s still a restlessness underneath. That restlessness is the Gap, the space between the life you’ve built and the person you actually are. Close it, and inner peace tends to follow.
So the question is, how do we find the right balance?
I personally believe our spiritual life comes first because it’s the essence of who we are. We are here on earth to learn, grow, and mature spiritually towards self-realization. In Buddhist philosophy, they refer to this as enlightenment.
From a Suited Monk perspective finding balance is achieved by following your Monk and then building a Suit around it. This will help you to balance your spiritual and material life.
Here are a few steps on how to apply this:
Your values are part of your Monk and inner self. The most important element is understanding your values. For example, my value is FREEDOM. I used to work as an expat in China for a global shipping company and my value of FREEDOM was not nurtured. I had to be in the office early and leave late in order to achieve business results and expectations. It is only when I decided to pursue my passion ”helping people” that I became an entrepreneur managing my own time and schedule that my value was nurtured. So listen to your values first and then build a Suit around it.
Action. I personally believe that action stimulates motion. Each time you take an action, life or the universe will help you to find your path and purpose in life. Without action, there is no motion. So for the lady described above, she can keep reflecting and thinking but if she doesn’t take action, nothing can / will happen. I think for most people FEAR is one of the biggest challenges, that holds us back from moving forward.
Discover where you stand between your spiritual & material self. Do your free Life Audit today
Patience. The Universe and life vibrate at their own pace… which means that life has its own flow. It is not fast it is not slow, it is just perfect and in alignment. In Taoist philosophy, it is the alignment of Yin and Yang. I can best describe it by looking at nature. Nature doesn’t speed up growth, it just grows. I feel business and the material world are based on fast-paced action. There is always more to learn and achieve. Sometimes we forget to take a step back and be patient and let life take its own flow. When you take action (Step 2), be patient and let life take its own flow.
Find a mentor who is familiar with balancing the spiritual and material world. Someone who is successful in his career but is also very spiritual. What kind of actions do they take in the material world and then apply spiritual principles for themselves to find that balance. There are 100’s of people who are practicing the alignment of the spiritual and material.
Daily practice. Living a fulfilling life is the ability to master the alignment of the spiritual with the material. This is something that has to be practiced daily. It was Aristotle who says that you have to habituate the virtues. It means you have to learn and master the spiritual principles daily in the midst of external challenges. Daily practice will lead you closer to alignment with your true self.
Philosophical counseling. Being able to balance a spiritual and material life requires a deep understanding of life itself. Philosophical counseling is a practice in which the counselor helps the individual on his/her life journey using wisdom and tools from philosophers such as Plato, Aristole, Lao Tzu. You can learn more about its benefits here
Without action, there is no motion.
Why Most People Struggle to Find This Balance
The modern world is built for the Suit, not the Monk. From an early age, we are conditioned to pursue external success such as career titles, income levels, and social status.
The spiritual dimension of life our values, our inner voice, our sense of purpose, is rarely taught in schools or celebrated at work. This creates a split identity. You achieve externally but feel empty internally. Or, like the friend described above, you are deeply spiritual but unable to translate that into meaningful action in the material world.
The Suited Monk framework exists precisely for this reason: to bridge the two. Your Monk is who you are, your values, your purpose, your intuition. Your Suit is how you show up in the world, your career, your relationships, your decisions. Real fulfilment comes when the two are aligned.
Signs Your Spiritual and Material Life Are Out of Balance
You may be out of alignment if you notice:
- You feel successful on paper but unfulfilled on the inside
- You make decisions based on money or status rather than your values
- You feel anxious or restless despite having “everything”
- You know you need to make a change but don’t know where to start
- You feel disconnected from your daily work or routine
- Your gut tells you one thing, but your mind argues for something else
Recognizing these signs is the first step. The awareness itself creates movement. If this feels familiar, here’s how to find your path in life again.
The Role of Philosophy in Balancing Spiritual and Material Life
Throughout history, philosophers have grappled with this exact tension. Aristotle spoke of eudaimonia living a flourishing life that integrates both virtue (the inner world) and action (the outer world). He didn’t separate the two; he saw them as inseparable.
Lao Tzu’s Taoism teaches wu wei effortless action, going with the natural flow of life rather than forcing it. This is the spiritual principle that underlies the Patience step described above.
Buddhist philosophy speaks of the Middle Way not extreme asceticism, not extreme materialism, but a conscious, aware life that integrates both dimensions.
The Suited Monk approach draws on all of these traditions and translates them into practical tools you can use today, whether you’re a CEO, an entrepreneur, or someone simply searching for their path.
How to Balance Spiritual and Physical Life Day to Day
Beyond the six steps above, here are daily habits that help maintain alignment:
Morning reflection (5 minutes): Before checking your phone, ask yourself: What do I value most today? What action would be true to that value? This anchors your spiritual self before the material world pulls you in.
Values check-in: Once a week, review your top three values and score how well your daily life reflected them. This keeps you honest and self-aware.
Journaling: Write without a filter. Let your Monk speak. Often the answers you are looking for are already inside you they just need space to emerge.
Seek stillness: Whether through meditation, walking in nature, or simply sitting in silence, stillness is where the Monk reconnects with itself. Even 10 minutes a day makes a meaningful difference.
If you’d like help closing your own Gap, you can work with me one-on-one.
Frequently Asked Questions
Nature doesn’t speed up growth, it just grows.
Summary:
Make a list of your top 10 values. For each value, identify if there are areas in your life in which you are NOT living a life true to that value. Brainstorm on actions you can take to make decisions true to that value. Secondly, when you make decisions in your life, listen to your Monk intuition first, what feels right for you in your gut feeling. This is the spiritual world. Secondly, apply your feeling in the material world. In this way, you will find more balance between the spiritual and the material.
If today you feel your material and the spiritual world need more alignment, you can take the free Life Audit, which will help you identify the Gap between your internal and external worlds. Do your free Life Audit today.
After you practice these principles for a few weeks you will find more happiness and peace within. You will be able to live a life true to yourself and find more alignment between your spiritual and material.
That balance is the whole of the two books. Start with The Suited Monk. Read Suited Monk Leadership when you are leading other people. Both are here: https://www.suitedmonk.com/books/
Where is your Gap right now? The free Life Audit takes a few minutes and shows you your Suit, Monk and Gap scores.
About the Author
Raf Adams has been helping people align their internal and external self and find their path in work and life. Originally from Belgium, he has lived in China for 12 years, Spain for 6 years and now Australia for almost 3 years, delivering workshops and seminars for companies, and is the author of The Suited Monk and Suited Monk Leadership.
Get your copy of The Suited Monk here
